Santé’s First Birthday: Choosing Memories Over Milestones

When it came time to plan my son’s first birthday, I did what most moms do — I started looking at venues, themes, cakes, and outfits. But something about it just didn’t feel right.

There’s so much pressure on moms to throw the perfect first birthday party — the Pinterest boards, the balloon arches, the matching outfits. And while I love beautiful details and meaningful celebrations, I’ve never been one to do things the “traditional” way.

I never had a bridal shower, a baby shower, or even a big wedding. Our wedding was an intimate destination celebration in one of our favorite places in Italy with only 30 guests — simple, soulful, and intentional. That’s always been our vibe.

So when I found myself stressing over guest lists and party favors, I had this moment of clarity: why are we doing this?

Sante wasn’t going to remember the party. He wouldn’t know how much time or money went into it. And the truth was — it started feeling like the focus was shifting away from him, and away from what this moment truly represented.

This first birthday wasn’t just about celebrating our son — it was about celebrating our first year as parents. A year that stretched us, strengthened us, and showed us what we’re truly capable of together.

We didn’t have a “village.” It was just the two of us, giving 100%, every single day — building businesses, raising funds for causes we care about, and showing up for Sante with full hearts and tired eyes. And it was the most fulfilling, transformative year of our lives.

So, after sending out the invites and half-planning a party, we looked at each other and said, “Let’s do this differently.” We canceled the party, packed our bags, and booked flights to Mexico.

A Birthday in Tulum

We decided to spend Sante’s first birthday in one of our favorite places — Tulum. We’ve visited many times over the years, and it always brings us back to what matters: nature, simplicity, and connection.

We stayed at Casa Malca, one of our absolute favorite hotels in Tulum, known for its design, art, food, hospitality, and the best spicy margaritas. When we arrived, the staff had the room decorated with balloons — such a sweet touch that made it feel special the moment we walked in.

Our mornings started with breakfast at Philosophy, the hotel’s beautiful beachfront restaurant, followed by hours on the beach and by the pool. This was Sante’s first beach vacation since learning to walk, and he was obsessed with the ocean — chasing waves, digging in the sand, and running full speed toward the water with the biggest smile on his face.

During his nap time, Brian and I would have a little time to ourselves — ordering room service, laying on the beach beds right outside our room, and sipping spicy skinny margaritas while watching the waves. Those quiet moments together felt like such a gift.

Our afternoons were spent back on the beach, playing in the waves, sharing frozen smoothies with Sante (his favorite thing), and soaking up the kind of joy you can only get from seeing the world through your child’s eyes.

The night before his birthday, Brian and I spent the evening putting together a video of Sante’s first year — his milestones, giggles, first steps, and the little everyday moments in between. Watching it back brought so much joy… and a lot of tears. It was the perfect way to reflect on everything the year had brought us. It’s something we’ve now decided to make a yearly tradition — a time capsule of memories to look back on as a family.

That night we ordered dessert and tea to the room and fell asleep to the sound of the ocean. It was peaceful, grounding, and everything we needed — no chaos, no to-do lists, no pressure.

Sometimes the best way to celebrate life’s biggest milestones is to strip them down to what truly matters — love, presence, and memories that last far longer than any party ever could.

For the Mamas

If you’re a mom reading this and feeling the pressure to do all the things — the parties, the themes, the perfect photos — I just want to remind you: you get to define what celebration looks like for your family.

There’s no right way to do it. Sometimes it’s a big party surrounded by loved ones, and sometimes it’s a quiet week in nature, just the people who matter most. What matters isn’t how it looks — it’s how it feels.

Motherhood has taught me that the simplest moments often become the most sacred memories. You don’t need the perfect setup to create magic — just presence, love, and intention.

Here’s to doing things differently. To celebrating in a way that feels true to you. And to never forgetting that sometimes, the smallest circle holds the biggest joy.